im about as happy as oj after his trial
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
