How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
