i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
