i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
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