There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Randomize
