so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
