Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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