whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
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