bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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