Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
