Small penises have feelings too.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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