I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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