I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
