I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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