he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
