guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I need to sanitize my soul.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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