Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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