Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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