We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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