My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
