The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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