we're blogging at a bar
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
