brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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