This dress was meant to end up on your floor
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
