i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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