didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Randomize
