Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize