5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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