I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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