Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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