After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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