I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
