I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
