I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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