I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
The Olympian is in my bed
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
