It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Randomize
