READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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