Grow some girl-balls and come out already
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
