Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
