You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
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