Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
