I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
