i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
