I feel like abortions should bother me more
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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