wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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