At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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