Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
