we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
