i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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