I'm lost and stupid without you.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
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